Race Recap: Bataan Memorial Death March - My 1st Full Marathon

Race Location: White Sands Missile Range (WSMR), New Mexico

Race Date: Sunday, March 17, 2013

Race day - 2:
Well, the day had finally come. It was time to get ready to head towards my very first full marathon. Admittedly, I hadn't trained anywhere near as much as I should have. I had a case of nerves that I hadn't really felt since my first half marathon or the first time I did Spartan Sprint last month. In late February I had received an injection of confidence and purpose when a Facebook friend told me the story about her great-aunt who was a military nurse taken as a POW after the surrender at Bataan. I decided to dedicate this race to her and the other female military and civilian nurses and healthcare workers taken prisoner after Bataan. However, even with this new sense of purpose I had a recurring sense that I was about to fail at probably the most meaningful race I could have entered to date. I actually considered paying the $50 fee to change to the short route, but I had dedicated 26.2 to the Angels...so 26.2 miles it would be.

My veterans dedication bib and my special dedication bib
for the Angels of Bataan.

The bib I printed to wear during the race dedicating it to the Angels of Bataan.

The husband was on Spring Break from the college and university so the timing couldn't be much better. I had managed to get almost all of my pre-race ritual housecleaning done on Thursday and just had a few things I needed to do plus get my packing done. We finally left at about 12:30pm or so for the roughly 5 hour trip to White Sands Missile Range...an operating Army missile base that you may have seen parts of on Mythbusters. We stopped in Roswell to get the husband a boonie hat for the race as well as something quick to eat. Why is it that I only seem to eat at McDonald's when I travel for races?? Yuck! (And I used to be a huge McD's fan!) After that it was pretty much a straight shot to WSMR. We got to the Community Center on base where they were doing the marchers in processing. You have to go through a series of rooms to get everything done but it wasn't too bad since we arrived for the first day of registration. I think, IMHO, that in the future they should move it to a more open area but this was still workable. We picked up our packets, hubs was doing the 14.2 Honorary March) and looked around at the race merchandise for a bit. I really wish I was paying more attention because if I had seen the "I Survived the Bataan Memorial Death March" decal I would have bought one for sure (just in case).

Race packet swag.

Commemorative timing chip.

Commemorative dog tag...no bling except for those who place.

Certificate of participation.

We headed back to Holloman AFB just about 40 minutes east of WSMR where we were going to be staying for the next two nights. After we got into our room we headed into Alamogordo to eat at Carino's to continue the carb loading that is my habit for the week prior to a race. We got back to the room around 10pm and started getting our race gear together and made plans to make a trip into Las Cruces for breakfast, to buy some tech shorts for the hubs and watch  21 & Over (5th time for me, 2nd time for the hubs).

Race Day -1:

We got out the door and headed for Las Cruces at about 9am and stopped at The Village Inn for breakfast...great timing because the place filled up just after we were seated. We then stopped at Dick's Sporting goods before heading over to the Telshor theater to watch my 2nd favorite movie after Pitch Perfect! LOL! After the trip to Las Cruces we had to run back to the room to pick up some virtual race medals for the team from West Point Military Academy who would be competing in the Military - Heavy Division (full uniform with packs > 35 pounds. After we picked up the medals, we headed back to WSMR to attend the meet and greet for the survivors. The meet and greet was in the Professional Development Center and broken out into several different rooms with a survivor speaking in each one. There were no survivor's names assigned to the rooms so it was kind of a pot shot as to who we'd be hearing from. We ended up in the auditorium where Col. Ben Skardon was scheduled to speak. The man, 94 years old now, had a sense of humor about surviving the March and captivity, along with a deep reverence for his comrades who were no longer living as well as a sly, sparkle in his eye when talking about the Angels of Bataan (whom I had asked about) as well as the nurses who cared for him after liberation from a Japanese POW camp. After his talk I went up to thank him for his time and asked if he knew Lt Thor, the Angel that I was dedicating my race to. Unfortunately, he didn't know her but he saw that I was Filipina and he went on to talk about working with the Philippine Scouts in the region of Cebu where some of my family hails from. I cannot tell you how many times I had tears in my eyes during his talk, nor the amount of laughter that he was able to elicit while talking about such a deep subject. This man would be walking 9 miles of the route the following day with the help of his family.

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Blurry cell phone shot of Col. Ben Skardon during his talk.
Click here for a video of Col. Skardon talking about his captivity in 2012.

After the presentation we headed over to the Frontier Club for the pasta buffet. I looked around for some of the Team Red, White & Blue members and knew that the West Point cadets would be with them. This is when I presented their medals to them. I spoke for a while with one of the national leaders and took the photo of the West Point-ers. While eating we also met a couple of Marathon Maniacs (I had purposefully planned to wear my Half Fanatics shirt to meet other HFs or MMs) one of whom was an active duty colonel at Wright-Patterson AFB and another girl from San Jose plus her friend who was from San Leandro (both some of my NorCal SF Bay area neighbors). We had a great time just chatting about races, doing Bataan for the first time and encouraging each other...

The four cadets from West Point, there was a last minute addition from
Annapolis Naval Academy to round out the team who is not in the picture.

My new Marathon Maniac running friends on race morning.
Dan-O was competing in the Individual Military Light Division.

More Marathon Maniacs and I. I'm the only true Half Fanatic.
Some of the Maniacs are Double Agents, meaning that they are both
Half Fanatics and Marathon Maniacs...I'll be one of them by fall.

We were going to watch the movie Forgotten Soldiers which was about the men of the Death March, but we wanted to try to get to bed early since we would have to be heading to the base at 3:30-4am the next morning. Instead we headed back to HAFB at about 7:30pm to finish getting our gear ready and try to get some sleep. I popped a milligram of Xanax hoping for some decent sleep since 26.2 miles was going to be a distance that I'd never done and I wanted to be rested...I'd find out the next morning if it was a good idea or not.



Race Day:
Well, as always on race day the alarm went off too soon...this time at 2:30am. I was a little slow to wake up and by the time I did the hubs was already out of the shower. I had just a slight Xanax hangover which was quickly washed away after a nice, hot shower...yes, I'm one of those people who has to take a shower in the morning to wake up even on race day. Taped up my knees, calves and shins for what I truly expected to be a long and rough day then got dressed. We got everything packed into the car since we would be making...or rather the hubs...the nearly 5 hour drive home right after the race. We checked out of lodging and were on the road for the 30 minute or so drive back to WSMR.

We got there at about 5am and traffic was slow but not painful. We managed to park right across from the staging area and get everything set up. We headed over to the Team Red, White and Blue RV to meet up with some of the members and see if a "before" pic were to be had. Unfortunately there wasn't so we headed across the street to get in line for the call of nature before heading over to the fire truck that was flying the gigantic Stars and Stripes to find the group pic for the Marathon Maniacs and the one lone Half Fanatic (me). By the time we got the pics taken, it was time to get to our separate staging areas for the start. Hubs made his way to the back end of the group where the Honorary (Short Course) marchers were while I took my place among the Civilian - Light marchers.

The temp was in the low 50°'s and the wind was fairly calm. The local high school choir sang The Star Spangled Banner and a bagpipe regiment played after the names of the most recently deceased survivors were announced. Prior to the names of the recently deceased, the survivors in attendance were identified in a roll call with their voices strong over the sound system. The poem written by journalist Frank Hewlett during the war to call attention to the men of Bataan was read:

The Battling Bastards of Bataan emblem
with the Philippine Defense medal.

We're the Battling Bastards of Bataan,

No Mama, No Papa, No Uncle Sam,

No aunts, no uncles, no cousins, no nieces,

No pills, no planes, no artillery pieces,

And nobody gives a damn!

It was after this that the tone of the start focused solely on why this race was happening...to remember those men who suffered through the 80+ mile forced march with little in the way of provisions, medical care and in the worst possible conditions during their days as POWs. This race is to be sure that their courage, bravery in the face of adversity will never be forgotten.

There was a multi-wave start with the Wounded Warriors leading the way. With each different wave a cannon announced their start. There were the survivors at the sides of the start shaking hands with those of us who went towards them. There were 15 total survivors in attendance and I had the opportunity to shake hands with 3 of them as I headed out on the course.

The first part of the course was on the roadways of the base, by mile 3 we were on groomed/bulldozed trails  out past the sports complex. Things were a bit crowded, but the course was flat. I found it necessary to jog past people occasionally to get past slower groups or to simply get away from the dust being kicked up by so many people in one place. The sand as never too bad here and most of the course was fairly well packed.

Around mile 3 or 4...

By water/aid stop #3 we were back on the asphalt. This was also where the two different routes diverged and I headed off the base towards the "hills." We remained on the roadway for a few miles with some slight inclines and then came this view...

Water/Aid stop #3/#9...the point where the two routes split up.
Not too long after I was passed by the 3rd runner headed
back to the finish...his mile 19!

Around mile 9...the hills begin.

At about mile 10 they had set up some misters...to bad the wind was blowing one side of the mist back onto the desert instead of the marchers! By about mile 11 we were back on groomed trail although it was quite a bit sandier than the previous portion of trial...

Back on the trails at around mile 11. The sand isn't too deep, but it's there. 

At this point in the race it became mostly an uphill climb...near constant. Those of you who know me know that I am not a fan of hills, but I persevered often wondering to myself if this climb will ever end. I made it to mile 13 and was elated that I was almost at the halfway point. I also thought that I was at the top of the climb, but WRONG!! There was still more to go...I stopped at the mile 14 water/aid station (and hot dogs, hamburgers, chips station) to empty the sand out of my shoes for the first of many times during the remainder of the race. By mile 15 or 16 I had reached what I think is the pinnacle for the climb...

The Canadians had been here!

Yeah, that's WSMR way down yonder!

I was fooled again into thinking that it was all downhill from here. It was downhill for a bit and then the climb started again. At about mile 16 or 17 they had a clock up and this is my time as of then...

I didn't think that was too bad for hiking the course.

By the time I got back on the asphalt at about mile 18 or 19 I was never so happy to be on solid ground. I had stopped at least 6 times since my first stop to empty the sand from my shoes. My feet were tender from forcing myself to keep going with the sand/pebbles in my shoes and I was tired from all the climbing. Lesson learned from this first experience...next year and thereafter I would wear gaiters or running boots!

I was happy to be back on the asphalt for even just the few miles before we ended up back on a trail. My feet were tender and tingling like pins and needles. About a mile past the #3/#9 water and aid stop where the two courses had split up, we turned across the road and back onto groomed PT/marching trails. The sand in some points was terrible, especially in the region of mile 21 where I'm told that the man made "sand pit" is. The sand did seem slightly deeper here than in other places, but I didn't think it was as bad as people were saying...until I went in nearly ankle deep and got a bunch of sand in my shoe again! I stopped at the mile 22 water/aid station and literally sat there for 10 minutes emptying out my shoes and just long enough for the med techs to come and check that I was okay. I was just dreading putting my shoes back on because since I had rested them there was blood flowing freely again and I knew that as soon as I stood up the pins and needles sensation would start all over again.

I had received a text from the hubs saying that he had finished and to let him know when I got to mile 24 so he could meet me. From that point on all I could think about was my cold post race chocolate milk, teriyaki beef jerky and the ability to take of my shoes and put on my Birkenstocks! I kept moving on listening to my music with a lot of Pitbull and David Guetta in these last few miles. That beat really kept me going and still singing to myself (aloud if no one was around) taking one step at a time. By the time we hit the backside of base housing the wind had whipped up and was probably well into the 20+mph range. A few times I actually had to use my bandana to keep from breathing in the thick dust. Then I saw it...that magic mile 26 marker. There were a bunch of active duty Army women there doing the Military Light Division resting and just getting up to try to keep going. It was nice to know that I wasn't the only one moaning and groaning about my tender feet! I took a group pic for them and they returned the favor and took my first pic at mile 26 (hopefully one of many to come).

Hot damn! I'm actually doing this!! Only 0.2 miles to go!

We all pretty much headed out to the finish together. In the last 100 feet or so each of the Army ladies took off in a jog to finish (teams had to finish within 20 seconds of each member) and once they were all there they crossed the line together. I started a strong jog about 75 feet from the finish...I didn't even really look at the time but I think it was about an 8:31 clock time (my MotoACTV had died along the course so I had no real idea of my time). I went straight for the med tent just to get some ice to ice up my calves but you had to go through and get seen and checked out even if all you wanted was ice. Along the way I reassured one of the other Team Red, White & Blue females that I was just wanting to ice my legs and that nothing else was wrong. So because of all the red tape I skipped that and headed ever so slowly back to the car. 

After we got settled we drove by and saw that most of the Team RWB camp was broken down already so we headed back to Holloman AFB so I could go to the gym to take a shower and so that we could stop at Popeye's for dinner. I could've gone to the base on WSMR but they had people sleeping in there for the race so I thought it would be less of a hassle at HAFB. Once at Holloman I had the hubs drive me to the door of the gym and I slowly made my way to the women's locker room. I knew I was going to have a crazy suntan between my compression shorts, KT Tape and compression socks and this is what I ended up with...

I'll never have an even tan this summer unless it's fake!!
Unfortunately, I didn't have any baby oil to loosen the adhesive
so I ended up taking a layer of skin off while removing the tape in the shower...

After I finally finished my shower we headed over to Popeye's to eat only to find out that they close early on Sundays. We ended up at Denny's where I ordered fish and chips but barely at any of it. It may have been the quart and a half of chocolate milk I drank, plus nearly half a liter of Gatorade but this was the first time in many races that I wasn't anywhere near being starving at the end of a run! So odd!

All in all it was a great, inspiring and challenging weekend. This is a race to do for all the right reasons...not necessarily a race to complete for time or a new personal record. This is a race to remember the sacrifice of the men and women of Bataan/Corregidor.

What I liked (loved) about this race?

Everything!! Seriously...the reason and importance of the memorial...to remember those that suffered through the Bataan Death March. I'm honored to have had the chance to meet and/or shake hands with some of them. This race touches me on so many different levels from being a female military veteran, to being a nurse having worked in the Air Force and Veterans Affairs healthcare systems to being a full blooded American born Filipina. The story of the "Angels of Bataan" or "Battling Belles of Bataan" is something that I will not let die and be forgotten! I also thank Col. Skardon for telling me "...the Philippine Scouts/Army doesn't get the recognition it deserves..." in reference to the Death March and WWII. That truly means a lot to me.  Course support is OUTSTANDING even though it's primarily a closed course.

What I did not like about this race?

The only thing really is the in processing...everything else was great! Well...I wouldn't mind the hills not being there but that's what this race is all about...being uncomfortable in a controlled situation unlike the veterans of Bataan.

Will I do this race again?
I will be here annually from now on...possibly at the expense of the Virginia Beach Shamrock Marathon which has been on my radar since I started racing. It'll be on my calendar for the rest of my racing/running life!! :D

Results:
Not too far off of the middle of the pack...totally happy with that!! :D


BETH HARDY
Gender: 376/668 
Clock Time: 8:29:18 
Chip Time: 8:19:47 
Pace: 19:04 
Bib: 1502

Race Recap: WDW Princess Half Marathon Weekend, Pre-race

5K Race Day: Saturday, February 23, 2013 @ 6:30am
Half Marathon: Sunday , February 24, 2013 @ 5:45am
Location: Walt Disney World Resort, Lake Buena Vista, FL

Travel Day - Thursday, February 21, 2013
Well, it really starts the day before travel day. I had decided at about 8:30am not to drive to Albuquerque to stay overnight before my flight because a friend I was supposed to meet had her new grand daughter born the day before. I knew bad weather was coming in due to a winter storm watch/advisory but it looked like the storm was tracking north of us so I didn't give it much concern and went about my normal pre-race/pre-trip cleanup. At about 5pm I saw that the weather had worsened and I began panicking that I would miss my flight, so I decided to go ahead and drive up and just find a hotel when I got up there (had already canceled my previous reservation). So I get on the road shortly after 6pm and immediately ran into severely, thick fog...much like what can appear in the California Central Valley. I ended up having a minor anxiety attack on the road and ended up returning home instead.

The next morning I woke up at 3am to check the forecast and now the last half of the trip was "snow packed and icy." Great! I was out the door by 4am and was not happy to be hit with fresh snow and small hail before even getting out of town! I managed to make my way through somewhat icy roads to the next town over after which the roads became almost totally clear until I reached I-40. After traveling about 25 miles west on the interstate, the roads became slushy but were well sanded/salted and relatively easy to drive on. Once I hit the mountains just east of Albuquerque portions of the interstate were not as well maintained and travel slowed to about 5-10 mph below the speed limit. This slow moving traffic continued even into Albuquerque where the Interstate was mostly clear...go figure. Since I had made the trip just about 20 minutes longer than I normally would have on clear roads I had arrived early enough to stop for breakfast at Denny's before heading to the Sunport (the name of Albuquerque's airport). As I sat there getting ready to eat I received a notification text from Southwest Airlines with the ominous words..."flight has been canceled." Really?? Did I just drive nearly 4 hours over questionable roads and weather to catch a flight that was no longer going to happen? I immediately called SWA to try to reschedule the flight. I had two choices...a mid-afternoon flight with a long layover somewhere or a 6:25pm flight with one stop but no plane change. I went with the latter. When I posted on Facebook the time of my flight I was pleasantly surprised to find out that my running friend/Tink sister, Kathleen, was catching the same flight as a connection from SeaTac. This is the same woman who walked with me so that I could finish the TinkerBell Half Marathon last month! It was pure serendipity that we would be together for the trip to our next race! :D

So, now I had time to kill. I loitered in Denny's for about an hour after I had finished eating then headed over to Barnes and Noble's to loiter there for awhile! Thankfully I managed to walk out of there purchasing only 2 magazines...that store is one of my shopping weaknesses. Since it was just after 11am I went to watch Les Miserables which was just totally fantastic! That will be a definite purchase when it comes out on DVD/BlueRay. By the time the  movie was over it was about 3pm. I made a quick trip to Party City to find a tiara to wear during the weekend then stopped at Jack in the Box for lunch before heading to the airport to check myself and my bags in.

As I made my way to the gate, I met two girls from NorCal who were running the Princess HM as their first Disney race. The dead giveaway was the tutu that they were bedazzling at one of the tables near the gate. We chatted for awhile and I showed them some of the Facebook groups pertaining to the race and costumes. Finally it was after 5:20pm and the plane from Seattle had landed and I waited for Kat to come through the gate (being sure to wear my tiara). There were some muffled squeals of excitement and big hugs going on when she finally appeared! I introduced her to the new girls and we just hung out for about an hour before boarding began. It turned out that the lady who completed our row of seats was also going to run the race. All in all I counted about a dozen Princesses on board.

Run Kat and I reunited at the Albuquerque Sunport
for the first time since the TinkerBell HM.

Once we landed in Orlando after a fairly uneventful flight, we grabbed out bags and headed in the direction that we thought the WDW Magical Express shuttle was. Unfortunately, even though we both had used the service before we forgot that it was located on the other side of the airport. So, after we finally got directions we made our way there along with other runners who also had gotten lost! It was at this point that we had to separate due to being at different Disney properties.

I finally arrived at the All Star Sports resort where my room mates, Dianne and Chris, had already checked in. After unpacking what needed to be hung up and my toiletries it was bedtime according to EST as it was something like 1am and I had an early day planned.

Fit for a Princess Race Expo - Friday, February 22, 2013

All Star Sports Resort pre-Expo breakfast meetup.
Dianne was our Perfect Princes...5 year Legacy Runner, the rest of us were PHM newbies.
(L to R: Eric, Dianne, me & Sandy)

I had arranged a breakfast meetup for any of the Disney's Princess Half Marathon Facebook page that were staying at the same resort. At first we thought no one was showing up until a young man sat down at the end of the table. I knew that there had been a male who was looking to meet other runners and I had invited him to join us if he was at the resort, but I wasn't sure if it was him or not. I asked if he was Eric, the guy I had invited and indeed he was! We had him move over by us, I think I promised that we wouldn't bite, and introduced ourselves. He was from Minnesota and this was his first Disney race. Then another lady, Sandy, stopped by the table asking if we were from the group and she joined us as well. We sat there talking and eating until about 8am when we split up to get ready to catch the first shuttle to the expo at 8:30.

Dianne and I at the Expo...
the volunteer taking the pic was a little shaky!

A little Princess nuttiness at the New Balance booth at the Expo! LOL!

Dianne and I got into the line at about 8:20 or so and were able to get on the first bus that was running about 15 minutes late. By the time we got to the Coronado Springs resort the line to get into the expo was probably close to a couple of hundred people deep already. Once we got in, we walked around the vendors area for a while to see what there was then headed to the runDisney Official Merchandise store. That was pure craziness! The line to get in wound in different directions outside the entry way to the booth. Once we got in it was literally packed like sardines, trying to get to items on either side was near impossible because the line to pay for items was winding around inside the sales area. I knew what I was getting so I got my stuff and got into line since it would take awhile Dianne grabbed some last items then joined me in line.

For some reason I had the bright idea to have my debit card ready to go even though we would be in line for at least another 20 minutes. At some point while in line I dropped it and didn't notice. When I did notice, I went walking up and down the massive line looking on the floor to see if I could find it. After a couple times doing this I finally went down the line literally yelling over the din for people to look at their feet to see if they could see a lost debit card on the ground...yes, it was that packed there was no way that I could see all of the floor so I enlisted the help of the people in line. When that failed I asked Dianne if she could cover my purchase for me while I called the bank to make other arrangements. I stopped at the registers to see if anyone had dropped off the card with no luck, I then went to the lost and found booth and they didn't have it either. I called the bank and suspended the card and found out that they couldn't get me a new card until Monday...not good since I didn't have any cash. I told them to hold off on canceling the card and I went back to the booth and asked again at the entrance (they were restricting access by then) and the lady came back with my card in her hand. Talk about a sense of relief!! I then went in search of Dianne who was unable to print up her 5K waiver so while she went to the runner's service booth I picked up my race packets for both the half marathon and 5k. We finally got back together and had an animated gif photo shoot done then headed over to join the DPHM Facebook group's meetup. We met a few of the other members and then went back into the vendors area one last time before heading back to the resort.

Race packet swag and Expo purchases.

When we went out to the shuttle pickup area, I noticed that there was a shuttle to the military resort, Shades of Green. I had planned to go there to do some basic grocery shopping because the prices in their c-store were more like normal off resort prices plus I needed to get my military special park ticket. So we hopped on the bus and were whisked away straight to SoG. We both got some stuff in the c-store and I purchased my ticket and we caught the next shuttle back to the expo. Since the c-store didn't have fresh fruit/vegetables we briefly went back into the expo to get some bananas from the Chiquita banana booth. This was the first time I actually had to play a game of Plinko in order to get a banana! Usually you can just go up and ask for them. Anyway, I actually won 2 bananas and a cheap pair of sunglasses...just the perfect number of bananas to get me through until race day.

After the expo, which was strictly for the bananas, we got on the bus back to the resort and Dianne and Chris headed out to Downtown Disney to eat. I wanted to go to the Magic Kingdom but was so tired that I decided to take a nap. I ended up sleeping for 3 hours.When I finally awoke I ate some dinner and caught the shuttle to the Magic Kingdom. It was overcast and humid and I arrived at the park literally at the tail end of the Light Parade. I made my way to Thunder Mountain Railroad, It's a Small World (a ride I hadn't been on since my kids were little), Under the Sea, Space Mountain, Space Ranger Spin, Stitch's Great Escape, the Haunted Mansion and lastly Pirates of the Caribbean. My waits for any of the rides was no more than 15 minutes and just before I went to the Haunted Mansion it began sprinkling and by the time I came out a full blown tropical rain had started and most people were trying to stay out of the rain and I ended up basically walking right onto Pirates of the Caribbean.

Arrived just in time to catch the end of the Electrical Light Parade...

Thunder Mountain Railroad...my second fave ride behind
Space Mountain. Yes, I do love roller coasters!

The fireworks started right as I got onto TMR.

Woot! First time on It's A Small World in probably over 15 years!

By now it was just about closing time, 11pm, and I decided that I wanted to get a churro as I left the park but because it was so late all the vendors had already packed up. So the back up plan was going to Downtown Disney to get a sundae at Ghiradelli's which meant taking the shuttle back to the resort and catching a shuttle from there to DTD. I arrived back at All Star Sports just around 11:15pm and had to wait a few minutes for the next shuttle to DTD to arrive. It finally got there at about 11:30pm and left about 5 minutes later to make the rounds at the rest of the All Star resorts. I had begun to watch the time because while I was waiting I had looked up Ghiradelli's hours and found that they closed at midnight.  This literally had to be the slowest shuttle ride I've ever had at WDW!! It seemed like other shuttles were zooming by us as I watched the minutes tick away.We finally arrived at DTD I headed at a pretty fast, but not running clip to Ghiradelli. I was happy to see that it wasn't shut down yet and that there were still people in line...but I walked up to pull the doors open and...LOCKED! I looked at my phone and I had missed getting into the store by 4 minutes...four lousy minutes!!

Since I still had that craving for sweets I walked all over DTD looking for somewhere that had sundaes. The only two places were the bowling alley and I think House of Blues where it was a 2 person sundae...didn't need one that big for myself. So I headed to the bowling alley restaurant only to find out that the only thing they were serving were pizzas. Really, you can't make an ice cream sundae? Sheesh!! Luckily I remembered that I had a Snickers in my purse so I had to settle for that to quench my sweet tooth as I headed back to the resort after my epic fail for a Ghiradelli Treasure Island Sundae (warm brownie hot fudge sundae). I decided that it would definitely happen the next day.

When I got back to the resort I pretty much just got ready for bed since it was about 1am since we had to be at the Mickey & Minnie Royal Family 5K at something like 5:30am which meant a 3am alarm to wake up to...the story of my no sleep nights prior to a race! lol!

My Stand Against the Stigma of Mental Illness

A few weeks ago, I had officially added the Stand Up for Mental Health Campaign's header to my Twitter account and a link on my blog. I had already had the header up on Twitter for a couple of weeks prior to notifying HealthyPlace, the originator of the campaign, that I had done so. In that notification to HealthyPlace I included a brief outline of why I had added the header and of my background. I was asked if I would share my story either in a blog post that they could link to or in a story that theycould host on their page. I chose the former after reading this article about self-stigmatization which is something I haven't really done too much of...at least I think. I put myself out there for varying reasons...I've posted about my struggles in old blogs that I used to have or just venting on Facebook or Twitter, but it's just my nature and part of the career path that I chose...

I was diagnosed in 1997, about 2 months before I was supposed to graduate from my Masters degree program in nursing with a specialization as a Family Nurse Practitioner. Like many of us with bipolar disorder I had been an outstanding student throughout my whole life. Then all of a sudden, in late September I became increasingly depressed. Near suicidal at that point. I was doing preceptored clinicals, working on a thesis, working full time at an outpatient clinic and being a military wife/mom to two elementary aged kids. Luckily I had already been in treatment for unipolar depression for a year or two and was
seeing a therapist who also noted my mood swings and recommended an evaluation for bipolar.

Within a couple of weeks the official diagnosis of Bipolar 2 came in. My first action was to
read An Unquiet Mind by Kay Redfield Jamison. In this book, I found so much of me with a
lesser degree of symptoms as compared to Dr. Jamison. A lightbulb went off in my head and
that great "A-ha!" moment happened. Over the following years I would be able to retrace
my symptoms to my mid-teen years and so many questions about my previous behavior were
clarified. It was a year of finding out who I really was and the positive and negative
implications that my disorder had provided me with in my life.

I did manage to graduate with my master's degree that December with a lot of work and tears
and the dropping of my thesis course...thankfully it was optional. I went on to work as an
RN, never getting my license for my FNP because of the newness of the diagnosis and my own
fear of making wrong decisions if I was in a bad way. However, I did excel as an RN in different positions
but there always seemed to be a time that the stress just got to be too much and I ended up
resigning and taking several months off and even considering leaving nursing all together.

In 2004, after a 4 month or so hiatus from nursing, I began subbing at a clinical site for
the local nursing program. Teaching was something that I had wanted to do since I was in
licensed vocational nursing school so many years ago. I had found my niche. I came onto
the faculty full time the following Fall and the following year I volunteered to take over
the Psych/Mental Health component of the program for the upperclass students when the
previous instructor left.

This specific content was truly my niche. Teaching psych. I loved it. My interest in psych/mental health
had exploded with my diagnosis...my focus was primarily on bipolar and other mood disorders,
but I loved it all...the whole confusing lot of the DSM-IV-TR. While my goal was to teach
the students about the different diagnosis involved in mental health and their treatments
my personal goal was to help them learn to get over the stigma that the media and past
generations had built up about mental illness. I didn't want my students to be me when I was on my
psych/mental health clinical rotation in RN school...fearful and trying to avoid interacting whenever
possible.  I remember...my first question to the third semester classes was always, "Look around you...can you tell who might have a mental  illness?" Inevitably, they would all look around and appear a little blank as if to ask, "Why is she asking us this?" My next response would be to raise my hand and say, "I do!"

You see, I've never been shy about sharing my diagnosis. I've told employers almost from
the start even though I'm not required to by law. I've told co-workers not only for my own
good and patient safety but also so that they can be attuned to what's happening with me and call me out when things get a little stange (and they often did). Maybe it's only because I was in nursing but I'd
like to think that I'd be that open if I were working in a different field as well.

For me, personally, I felt that having the students know that I was battling what could be
a serious mental illness (I've attempted suicide at least 12 times in the past), that they
could see that it doesn't mean a mentally ill person could not be successful. I wanted them to
learn that they didn't need to fear mental illness. Granted, we're not all fully functional
but just the realization that a mentally ill person could look like me and be teaching a
class of 30-35 students about such a weighty subject could be an eye opener for some.

The students learned observations skills, communication skills and hopefully empathy from
not only classroom exercises and study, but also from observing me through  my good days
and my bad days. They learned to recognize when I had gone off my meds or when I was
becoming depressed or a little hypomanic. They were learning about mental illness in a
non-threatening way...OK, if you can just imagine nursing school being non-threatening.
But they were also learning to accept that I was a human being with a mental illness, no
different than any other human with a physical disorder. I just happen to have  an illness
that originates in my brain versus having diabetes which begins in the pancreas. They,
hopefully learned to understand that a mentally ill person is a human being...period...not
a monster or crazed individual to fear. Having this experience with me, I hope, prepared
them for our one week clinical at the state mental hospital where they had to
encounter more acute states of illness with a more open mind rather than fear; as well as for future encounters that they may have with the mentally ill.

Teaching gave me that opportunity to share not only my illness but to help, hopefully, break
the stigma of mental illness among the majority of my students. Granted, not everyone will
have made the connection, but I feel safe in saying that the vast majority did have their
eyes opened to the reality of mental illness while working with me. By the time I chose to finally
leave teaching in 2011 I was working on a second master's degree in Psych/Mental Health Nursing
and was within two semesters of graduating as a PMH NP as well as concurrently working
on a PhD in Nursing. Even though I have had to voluntarily remove myself from nursing due to a severe exacerbation of my symptoms between  2009 and 2011 I continue to do a guest lecture at the same nursing school each semester to try to help demystify mental illness and the stigma attached. That is the least I can do for now. At some point I'd love to start a support group through DBSA or NAMI but until I feel that I can be stable for a long period, or find a backup co-ordinator, that dream will have to stay
on the back burner for now. But no matter what, I'll continue to do what I can to help
break the stigma of mental illness and will hopefully one day be satisfied that I have done
everything I could to do so.

Race Recap: TinkerBell HM 2013, Part 1 : Pre-race

2nd Annual TinkerBell Half Marathon (AKA my worst race...ever)
Race Day: Sunday, January 20, 2013
Location: Disneyland Resort, Anaheim, CA

So, this was supposed to be a benchmark in my running "career." This was the second running of the TinkerBell Half Marathon and my second step towards achieving "Legacy" status (running in each of the first 5 years of a race) in a Disney race. Let's just say that it didn't go according to plan...

Race Day -3 (Thursday, January 17, 2013)

This was a travel day for me. Since I had organized our TinkerBell Half Marathon Facebook Group meetup, I was traveling with 2 suitcases for the first time for any race (thank you for the free bags Southwest Airlines). Unfortunately, they were two different types of bags which made handling them a little difficult. One was a softsided 360° spinning bag and an old hard shelled suitcase that was the only thing that I could fit the sign that I had ordered for the meetup into so that it wouldn't get damaged. Along with that I was carrying 150 button name tags that would be passed out to members of the group.

My flight out wasn't until 2:50pm CST and I made sure that there was no repeat of my travel woes that happened for the Mississippi Blues Half Marathon. I left plenty early to allow for the lost hour for the time change into Texas. In fact, I arrived almost 3 hours early for my flight giving me enough time to pick up some last minute items and a sandwich before entering the airport. Most of my time waiting was spent on the laptop either playing on Facebook/Twitter or watching my Pitch Perfect DVD...yes, even when traveling I have to get my fix of this movie at least once a day! lol! The flight out of Amarillo and into Las Vegas was late but uneventful and it still blows my mind that McCarran International Airport has a severe lack of outlets/computer charging stations in this day and age. I mean, really?? After a short layover we boarded the short 45 minute flight into LAX. There really wasn't a whole lot of time to do anything on this flight so I just listened to my music and tried to nap with a 6 year old (or so) talking at the top of his voice sitting in the row in back of me.

My flight landed a little early and I had hoped to catch a 6pm Disney Resort Express shuttle to the hotel, but found out that it wouldn't be making it's next pass through the airport until 6:30pm. Thankfully it was warm outside with only the slightest of breezes, much different from the windy, 30-40° back home in New Mexico, so I just sat on my suitcase and waited outside while playing on my tablet and listening to music. Once I finally arrived at the hotel, I met one of my room mates, Jessica, who was a total stranger other than our interactions on the Facebook group. A couple of hours later my running buddy from the inaugural TinkerBell HM, Melanie, and her friend, Noreen, arrived to round out our group of four. Now, considering that the last time I had shared a room with 3 other chicks was when I was a young teenager I knew that this would be an interesting event with 4 grown women sharing a single room. lol!

This was a night to stay in because the race expo would be in the morning and I'd need to be there early to help work the SparkleSkirts booth through the morning and into the early afternoon. So, after chatting and catching up on things we all turned in at around 11pm in preparation for the next day.

Race Day -2 (Friday, January 18, 2013)

My earnings/purchases and official race shirt from the Expo minus
the ear buds and mini Minnie ears/barrettes thatI lost on race day.
Pic taken about a month late...whoops! lol!

Melanie was up bright and early in order to go attend the runDisney Galloway Meetup, she had been lucky enough to get her name on the RSVP list that literally closed within minutes, if not seconds, after opening. In fact, she had to change her travel plans and leave a day early because she had originally planned to arrive on Friday rather than Thursday but this meetup was an opportunity that she couldn't miss. I was already up and just procrastinating on getting ready. Once I finally did get up and out of bed, I got dressed and prepared to walk over to the Disneyland Hotel with Noreen (a first time Disneyland/Disney California Adventures visitor) so that she could eventually meet up with Melanie. Jessica did the right thing and headed to the gym when we all went our separate ways.

After I got Noreen to the Disneyland Hotel, I headed down to the expo to start work at the booth. Now, I try to volunteer for the SparkleSkirts booth whenever I can just because I believe in their product so much and this was the second time I would work with them, the first time being at the WDW Wine & Dine HM. I truly love Leah and Tom and have purchased their tech skorts and medal hangers several times. I always have fun working with the customers and trying to eventually get someone to convert to the brand.

My first time back on the Tower of Terror in
probably a decade?? Last time was at WDW.

While I was working, Jessica was kind enough to pick up my race packet for me and drop it off so that I could walk around the expo after my shift without having to wait in the pick up line. The girls stopped by the booth for a bit with Melanie making an unplanned purchase and we eventually met back in the room and headed over to the parks for an evening of rides. We really didn't get on too many rides...a couple of turns on the Tower of Terror, plus Buzz Lightyear, the Haunted Mansion, Pirates of the Caribbean, the Jungle Cruise and we had FastPasses to Space Mountain but it had broken down before we got a chance to get on. :( All in all we were probably in the park for 3-4 hours tops before heading back to the room with a stop at Denny's for a late dinner. Since Jessica had to be up early the next morning for the Neverland Family 5K and I had another morning shift at the SparkleSkirts booth, we both turned in fairly soon after arriving back in the room so that we could get an early start.

Race Day -1 (Saturday, January 19, 2013)

This day started out just like any other. I knew it was going to be busy since I was going to be working the booth, then managing the group meetup to be followed by the group pre-race dinner. Unfortunately this meant no trip into the parks for me on this day since the race was scheduled to start bright and early at 5am on Sunday morning. I realized early that I had been scheduled to start work at 9:45am but that the expo was scheduled to open at 9am so I decided to head over early just to see if they needed help sooner rather than later only to find that the expo had opened at 8am for a special group of people so it was serendipity that I showed up early.

In the afternoon, the next set of volunteers showed up and noticing that there was an hour overlap with 6 volunteers in a small booth, I opted to leave early so that I could get things ready for the group meetup. After resting up for about an hour I packed up the buttons/name tags, my label printer and the sign and headed over to the meetup location in front of Apricot Lane at Downtown Disney. Members of the group started to trickle in starting at about 3:45pm and by about 4:15pm I was catching up on name tags that I had missed making, started to introduce each other (the main goal of the meetup is to put faces to the names that we see on Facebook) and prepare for the group picture. This is the second of what will hopefully be an annual meetup although for me the 5 year legacy mark will likely be my final Tink HM. We all hung out for as long as we could with many of the original crew staying the longest catching up with each other. Then I was off again just after 5pm to bring back my bag of stuff to the hotel so that I wouldn't have to drag it around to dinner.

Our pre-race dinner race participants!

Our group dinner was held at Naples Ristorante in Downtown Disney at 6pm. In all there were 21 of us with about 11 being actual participants in the race the next day. This was a good mix of new Tink runners and original crew. We had a great dinner with great service and I think I would be speaking for all of us in that this is a great place to eat and would come with some very good recommendations from us. At about 8:30pm we said our goodbyes and headed out to prep for the race early the next morning. It had been a long but great day being able to meet new members of the group and catching up with some year long friendships that have continued courtesy of Facebook.

To be continued...and will include my medical issues that cropped up during the race and the aftermath.

When You Wish Upon a Star...

Long Title:
My first real attempt at getting into the runDisney Princess Half Marathon Meetup and Warm Up Run with Jeff Galloway

Well. That was fun. "What was that?" you ask?

Since last Wednesday (minus the 2 day weekend) I, and many others like me, have been poised at our computers/laptops/tables/phones in hopes of being one of the lucky few to get invited to attend the runDisney Princess Half Marathon Meetup & Warm Up Run with Jeff Galloway and other celebs. This year in addition to Jeff, runDisney's official dietician Tara Gidus, actor Sean Astin, The Biggest Loser's Ali Vincent, defending Princess HM and back to back Disneyland Half winner Rachel Booth and two time Paralympic track and field medalist April Holmes will be appearing at the meetup.

Now, I have never gotten into one of these events. They're pretty hard to get into and usually fill very quickly. Everything I've read or been told by past attendees makes them out to be an awesome experience. I mean really, how many times do you actually get to go for a run with a former Olympian? I've only tried to get my name into the 2013 Tinkerbell Half Marathon meetup and it was only a half hearted attempt. I did most of the things that you need to do to enter, but I just wasn't quick enough on the draw. This time I was ready! Now, while I really want to get in, it's not a do or die thing for me. It's more about the chase of friendly competition with others to get your name in before the window of opportunity closes. That doesn't mean that I'm going to not offer info on how the process works, but I'll invite others that are interested and share what knowledge I do have of the process.

The process for this year's Princess Half (PHM) meetup was different. Yes, we did the required wait...referred to the #refreshwaitrepeat on Twitter...but glitches occurred on Friday when the announcement was supposed to be made sending the process into an unprecedented fourth day (on Monday)! Yes, I was one of those people stuck to the screen for 4 days...well, actually from about 6am MST to anywhere between 1:10pm and 4:00pm on Wed thru Friday...then rudely getting awakened on Monday by a tweet notifying me of the announcing blog post at 5:35am MST at which time once I managed to gather my wits about me I went flying into the back room to my more reliable desktop to send in my email requesting inclusion in the event. I hurdled 3 dogs and when I slid into the rolling office chair I actually rolled away from the computer. My nerves were shot, I was shaking from the adrenaline surge and could barely type some updates onto a Facebook group that I belong to or into my own Facebook/Twitter feeds. It was only after I did manage to send my email and get my status updated that I found out that the actual blog post had been put up around 1:30am EST!! Whoaa!! That pretty much killed my chances then and there...if only I had refreshed the blog before I finally went to sleep at around 2am MST!! LOL!! :D

Such an early announcement has never been made and I don't expect many west coast hopefuls to be very happy as I know I wouldn't be. But it's a game and sometimes you win but most times you lose. There are plenty of people who never even get a chance to get their names in the hat even though they may have been working the process as well...as was the case for me during the TinkerBell meetup process.

So, the waiting game begins. Emails should be sent out to those invited by 4pm EST today with a link to a final list posted by 5pm on the Disney Parks blog. So I'm watching the ticker on my email account and will be checking every new email that comes in in hopes of being one of the lucky few...but if not I have at least 5 more runDisney to try to get into the meetup so no real loss on my part aside from my time and a little sanity.

Because of the "villians" (as runDisney put it) messing with the system, I wouldn't be surprised if changes happened to the process...but for now here are some tips that I've learned in the two times that I've attempted. These tips are subject to be incorrect at anytime...especially with the difficulties encountered with the PHM process so I really expect some major changes in the future!

• Download an auto refresh extension for whatever browser you use.
• Open a window for the Disney Parks Blog.
• Set your auto refresh to whatever timing you want...recommend 5-10 seconds. The blog is the first place they'll announce that the process is open.
• Open and monitor the @runDisney Twitter account...usually about a 5 second delay from the blog post.
• Set up your phone or other devices to receive SMS texts from @runDisney by texting "FOLLOW @runDisney" to 40404.
• Prepare an email that includes your full name to be sent to one of the following addresses (always double check in the blog post in case they change) depending on which park the race is at:
• RDL.SportsMeetUps@Disney.com
• WDW.SportsMeetUps@Disney.com
• Have the email open and ready to just click "Send" at a moments notice.
• NOTE: You can only send a single email from a single address...if they see more than one email addy for the same person it automatically disqualifies you.
• Once you see the announcement, you usually have literally seconds to send in the email because they fill up so fast (this was NOT the case with PHM).

Then the wait begins!! They will email you if you get in within a few hours (it's only been an hour or so since the PHM meetup process closed and emails are already going out).

NOTICE: Just to make it perfectly clear...this list is totally of my own work/original, not copied from any source. It includes information gleaned from online discussion in Facebook or Twitter, the Disney Parks Blog and from observing previous meetup processes as they occurred. I, in no way, copied or designed in any plagaristic manner from any files from any groups or websites.

Just FYI:

• Earliest day of announcement: Tuesday
• Earliest time of blog post: ~1:30am EST (I think...it was for this PHM)
• Latest day of announcement: Monday (for this PHM...but typically on Fridays)
• Latest time of blog post: ~3:30pm ET
• Usual window for announcement: ~10am-1pm ET

The one thing I want folks to remember out of participating in this kind of endeavor is that it is just a game! Don't take it too seriously!! Sometimes you win, most times you lose...there's almost always a next time.

Good luck to all the Princesses that got their names into the mix!

UPDATE @ 8:43am MST: The final list of 50 attendees is already posted on the Disney Parks Blog less than 2 hours after closing the process! Congrats to all that made it in...unfortunately I wasn't one of them. There's plenty more runDisney races to try again!! :D